Nia M Wardani | A Logbook of Life Discoveries

Abiku Memang Beda - Parenting Book by A Child



Parenting Book Cover Abiku Memang Beda
The Book Cover

What do you say if a child writes a parenting book? Parenting is hard enough for an adult, how can a hild teach you? There might be a lot of doubt, but if you read this book, your doubt will be replaced by awe.

Badiuzzaman Umar Humam is indeed exceptional. At the age of 12, he wrote a book about how his father parent him and his brothers. This book entitled ‘Abiku Memang Beda-Nasehat Abiku untuk Hidupku’ (My Father is Different-My Father’s Advice for My Life) is full of life advices that sometimes does not even cross most adults' minds. No wonder that the first batch of print, printed in July 2020, sold out within two months.

I got the second print of the book directly from the publisher Haksama Book, with a special price. :). The normal price itself is only 168.000 Indonesian Rupiah or about 12 USD.

The book I think is so astonishing that it does not need to win a prize to attract people to read it. Umar Humam wrote the book as his graduation project as a student at his father’s school. He wrote it himself, from the foreword to the last page about the author.

Yes, Umar Humam is a home-schooler. He used to go to a normal public school until one day his father decided to home-schooled him and his brothers at the age of 11. But this was not a typical home school. His father brought him to his company, met people, discussed finance with adults, studied books about history and geography, and did research about his family roots.

The book starts with a greeting for the readers. He mentioned that the book is very intentionally prepared, so that the reader has a good reading experience. He made decisions about the types of paper used, the font type and font size, so that everybody from different ages can read the book comfortably. I was impressed. But indeed, I finished this book only in one night. It feels comfortable to read the book that I feel like not letting the eye away from it.

Parenting Methods in Three Chapters

The book consists of three chapters. The first chapter is the first most important message his father gave him, the second is his fathers’ creed about life, and the last chapter is about his father’s view on education.

As you read through the book, these three chapters are actually being connected one another. Maybe because I read the book just in one night without stopping, so that for me, the distinction between the chapters is not very clear. Everything is very much related, and Umar Humam has written it like a flow.

The first chapter about his father’s first most important message for him, I quickly realized, was coming from the Hadits of Prophet Muhammad. It was a message given by prophet Muhammad peace be upon him, to about-13-year-old Ibn ‘Abbas.

Abu al-‘Abbas ‘Abdullah bin ‘Abbas(ra) reports:
“One day I was riding (a horse/camel) behind the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, when he said, ‘Young man, I will teach you some words. Be mindful of God, and He will take care of you. Be mindful of Him, and you shall find Him at your side. If you ask, ask of God. If you need help, seek it from God. Know that if the whole world were to gather together in order to help you, they would not be able to help you except if God had written so. And if the whole world were to gather together in order to harm you, they would not harm you except if God had written so. The pens have been lifted, and the pages are dry.’ ”(Related by Tirmidhi)

Be Mindfull of Allah

I immediately notice that what Umar Humam’s father practice in parenting his sons is practicing what Prophet Muhammad already teach us. Not only in the first message, but almost in every page. For this reason, it will be important to also analyze the parenting methods in this book and see the result if this method is being applied to modern world children. It would also be awesome if someone can translate this book so that all parents in the world can read this.

The second chapter about his father’s creed, is about the life principles his father taught him. The same like the first one, mostly are applying what has been taught by Prophet Muhammad Peace Be Upon Him.

The third chapter tells about his father’s view on modern education. Umar Humam is lucky to have this opportunity being in a personalized learning environment. But this book can also give you insight on how you can do it in your own situations, practical methods on how you could apply it, rather than just blaming the government or the society or the industry. YOU CAN TAKE CONTROL OF WHAT YOU LEARN!

The last page that made my heart tremble. Is an apology word from his father at the end of his home-school program, for being insufficient in educating him:

Last page parenting book Abiku Memang Beda

Dear students, if you read this, this is also what I want to say to you, but I have never have the courage to.😢

Yes, parents can never be perfect. There are always wins and fails. Many gives so much hope for their kid that it gives them burden, like in Eliana's story. But in the other hand, many underestimates their kids.

All in all, although this book is written by a 12-year-old kid, this is a very good parenting book. Umar Humam mentioned that there will be the second and the third book coming. I will, surely, wait for their releases. What about you? Are you interested in reading this book?
Nia M Wardani
Hi! Call me Nia. I discovers interesting things in life and I love to share them with all people around the world.

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  1. MasyaAllah, this is a very good book. Hope I can read this book also. This is really interesting for me about Umar's father decided to home schooled his children by himself and practice the parenting methode from Rasulullah SAW. Thanks sis for your sharing :)

  2. the book very recommended to me, how teach children like the method parenting Muhammad SAW

  3. Ahhh...baca url, kirain mbak Nia bakal nulis dalam bahasa Indonesia...kecele hehehhe

    Tapi bunda setuju, peran seorang ayah dalam parenting sangatlah besar. Itulah sebab, bunda kemudian bersyukur, kenapa dulu alm Bapak mau handle keempat anaknya saat memutuskan berpisah. Karena dalam Islam, nasab itu ke ayah.


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